How do you know you're ready?

When the only thing left on your to-do list is to re-paint your toe nails and copy your taxes.  :)

It's time.  A process that should have taken us eight to nine months will be done in five.  I believe there's a reason for that.  I believe it's because he needs us that bad.  Bad enough to move mountains, speed up slow moving governmental entities and allow us to slide in under the wire of so many cut offs and delays.  We have truly been blessed.  There is no way it could have gone this fast if we were merely acting on our own.  Further proof that Seth belongs here, with us.  Now. 

In just a few days, Jeremy and I will board the biggest plane we've ever flown on, to fly fourteen hours to get to our son, to tell him he finally has something no child should ever be denied- a family.  By this time next week, we will have our referral in hand and will be on our way to his region, to tell him that against all odds, we found him, and we're bringing him home. 

The hardest part is yet to come, and we know that.  Being away from our children will be difficult.  I already miss them so bad I ache.  I've never been away from my children for this long.  The only time I've been away for longer than a weekend was when my dad died, and then, Jeremy was here. 

Traveling home for fourteen hours with an orphan will be difficult.  Keeping any child entertained and happy for that long is hard.  Doing it solo, with a little boy who is fresh out of an institution, who will be traumatized and homesick, who is a virtual stranger, who speaks a different language and has CP will be grueling.  That's an understatement. 

Integrating him into our home will be challenging and at times, frustrating.  He's been neglected in every way possible.  Kids are resilient, and Jeremy and I are tough, but we are in for the challenge of a lifetime.  We know that.  We will need to learn to navigate the waters of trust issues, bonding, cerebral palsy, therapies, IEP's and advocating like crazy for a child who needs us. 

We have so much to learn.  And Seth needs us to hit the ground running.  So we will.  Remember that we never said this would be easy.  We're not doing it because it's easy.  It's not.  We're doing it because it's so darn worthwhile.  Because he's worth it.  Because his right to a family, to love, to therapy, to an education, is far more important than our right to an easy life. 

Please, please keep our family in your prayers while we meet him, discover who he is, and learn how to best help him.  Pray that his heart will be prepared for us, that he will trust quickly and easily, that he will feel peace.  Pray that Jeremy and I will have that parental intuition with him right from the start, that as he and I pray together, that we will be led to know what's right for Seth, a child we barely know.  Pray that we will have wisdom, compassion and above all, faith- faith in Heavenly Father, in His plan, a plan that we don't always understand.  Faith in a little boy who is stronger than me and has already overcome more than I can comprehend- rejection, abandonment, institutionalization, neglect.  Faith that if he's overcome this much, he will overcome so much more once given a chance, love, a home and a family. 

Believe in him.  Believe in this little boy.  He has so much to teach us.  This little boy is going to amaze us all!  I know that.  I know that way down deep in my soul.  He is going to change the very fabric of our family, in so many good ways.  In a year, we are going to wonder how we ever made it this far without Seth.

Welcome to the next phase of our journey....  :)