Our journey began as any typical day does around here. Early morning, trying to get four kids off to three different schools, making lunches, cleaning up the breakfast mess, starting the washer, finding matching socks, then hustling my slightly reluctant four year old out the door to pre-school so that the three year old and I could go run some errands. Adoption of a special needs child in Eastern Europe was the last thing on my mind.
Before I left, I sat down to check email and see what was going on in my friends lives on facebook. I quickly scanned status updates, stopping at one friend who was sponsoring a little boy in China, trying to raise money for his adoption so that when a family stepped forward, they would have a grant to help offset the cost. It caught my attention. I clicked on it and soon found myself looking into the eyes of an orphan... Zachary, a child who truly has nothing. I felt my heart sink just a little as I continued to look through all the children. Then I came to Phillip. I don't know how to explain it. He was mine. I knew it as clearly as if I had brought him home from the hospital. I was looking into the eyes of one of ours. Problem was, he was in Eastern Europe, in an orphanage, on the other side of the world.
But this couldn't be. How could a busy mom with six kids take on a 6 year old orphan in Eastern Europe with cerebral palsy? It didn't make sense. If we were going to adopt, why not a child right here in Spokane? As I thought about him, I received my answer. Why not Spokane? Because that's not where Phillip is. He is ours. He had just been born across the world.
Think about what you did for your child before bed last night. Did you help him brush his teeth? Get his jammies on? Read him a story? Help him say his prayers? Did he get a snack? Did you kiss him goodnight? Phillip has never gotten any of that. It's time he did. Phillip has had what we suspect is a pretty sad life. We don't know how long he's been in the orphanage. By pictures, I can guess at least three years. Maybe he's been there his whole life. Can you imagine?
Phillip has never felt a mothers love. He needs to be hugged and kissed, to be surrounded by people who will cheer him on. He needs to have enough food to fill his tummy, to never worry about food again. He needs clothes and toys that are his very own and the healthcare that might allow him to walk. He needs to get out of the crib where he spends most of his day. Knowing that we have what he so desperately needs just to live, how could we deny him? How could we deny him the very basics of life because we were too busy, too comfortable, or unwilling to sacrifice to that degree for a child? Phillip has likely never had anyone willing to sacrifice for him. His mother abandoned him and dumped him in an orphanage where he has sat and waited for six years. Hearing a prompting, would I too choose to walk away and abandon him, finding him too inconvenient for my life?
Jeremy came home. I waited til kids were in bed. I approached him about it, showed him pictures, explained Phillip's conditions. I told him I have no idea why I felt drawn to this little boy in EE, but I felt like we needed him. Jeremy initially voiced the same concerns... Our boys are young. We have a lot of kids. Life is pretty good. Crazy but predictable. Consistent. This would bring a lot of sacrifice and unknowns into our chaotic life. There would be things we've always dreamed of doing that we might not be able to, because we could be caring for this child in our home, forever.
We decided to pray about it. By noon the next day, Jeremy had gone from "We can't possibly do this" to "Let's go get him", and he has never once wavered. I, on the other hand, have swung back and forth wildly, like on a penduleum. We don't know the full extent of his cerebral palsy and that scares me. He can't walk. We are unsure whether he talks. A year ago the orphanage reported that he didn't, but we've heard reports from people who've seen him and say he does. Updates in the EE are few and far between, and a year changes a lot. We don't know how his cerebral palsey affects his mental capabilities. We know he's delayed. Is that environment or the CP? Can that be overcome?
All of these children are coming out of the orphanages small and physically and mentally delayed. He may just need some love and therapy to overcome... or he may never overcome. He certainly won't be "cured", as CP is not curable. We don't know, and likely won't know, til we get him home. Maybe even for months after that. But even if he never mentally or physically progresses from where he is right now, which is unlikely, he will undoubtedly have a better life. And isn't that what we're called to do? To lift anothers burdens? Succor the weak? Care for the orphans and the widows? To love and care for Heavenly Fathers children, to strengthen the defenseless? It's a major leap of faith, but we know, come what may, he is ours, and we are prepared to love him and help him be the very best he can be.
This is an account of our journey to go get Phillip. We expect to travel sometime in November or early December. If all goes well, we will have Phillip home well before Christmas. I don't know how he will react. The orphanage is probably the only "home" he's ever known. We will make his life substantially better, but he won't know that. He will have to trust us as we take his small hand in ours and walk away from the orphanage with literally nothing to his name, not even a pair of clothes to wear home. We'll put him on an enormous plane, to fly many many hours to our home in Spokane Washington, to greet our six exuberant, noisy, energetic kids. We don't speak his language. He doesn't speak ours. I can only communicate as a mother does- with the language of love. It's incomprehensible. It breaks my heart.
We found Phillip through Reece's Rainbow. Reece's Rainbow is not an adoption agency. They are a non-profit advocacy group for special needs, hard to place children in orphanages throughout the world who need homes. As part of their services, they offer a venue for fundraising to help offset the costs of the adoption, which is expensive. In addition, Phillip will have many doctors and therapy appointments when he gets home. His needs have been neglected for far too long. If you'd like to help us offset these costs and help us bring him home, we would certainly be grateful, but don't feel like you have to. We want you to follow our blog and journey either way. We have been told that the next six months will be a wild ride, so hang on with us as we take the journey together!
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