To Welcome Seth Home

Tomorrow, something very significant is going to happen in Seth's life.  Seth will be introduced to his siblings and to one set of his grandparents.  A child who has never known family will now have six brothers and sisters.  His brothers and sisters have never known a child who has spent their life in an orphanage.  They don't really know what institutionalization does to a childs spirit.  They've never experienced the reality of living with a child who has experienced profound loss.  And they've never lived with a child with a special need. 

Believe it or not, most orphans are not initially incredibly grateful to be a part of a family.  Most do not throw themselves into your arms and express their love and thankfulness.  What they do express is years and years of near or outright neglect, abandonment, boredom, understimulation, lack of social skills, manners, and basic life skills.  These are not, initially, well adjusted children.  These are hurt children.  And that hurt manifests itself in a variety of ways as they learn to trust and heal.  But this is a process, and it's sometimes painfully slow.  And sometimes just plain painful.  You have never heard a cry til you hear an orphan cry.  :(

To our dear friends and extended family in the Spokane area, we ask that you give us some time to begin to heal Seth, to teach him about love, trust and family.  Just like when we have a newborn, it takes time to adjust and find your new groove.  We know you all love him, are excited for him to have found his family and are anxious to meet him and welcome him.  We love you for that.  But please wait.  :)  Give us time with our "newborn".  

We are asking that everyone give us a month before trying to meet Seth.  You are welcome to come to our door, but understand when we step outside, rather than having you step in.  Please understand when we limit our social schedule, cancel on obligations, and generally make ourselves unavailable so we can make ourselves more available to our children.  For the next month, Jeremy and I will be focusing primarily on our six children who have not seen their parents in almost seven weeks, and on Seth.  We will be hesitant to commit to anything that is not directly related to one of our children.  If it's optional, we probably won't be there. Seth is simply not ready. 

If you see us out in public, you are welcome to wave to us and even come up and say hi, but please limit contact with Seth.  Remember that this is a child who up until a week ago, had never been outside the walls of his orphanage.  He is taking in and processing so much, so fast.  It will be overwhelming to him.  Something as basic as a trip to the grocery store is brand new to him.  He's never been to a park, to church, to a library.  He will need to experience each of those and be taught how to behave.  That takes time.  Please be compassionate.  Understand that orphans are not typical childen. 

We appreciate you understanding and your cooperation.  We are ever so grateful for your prayers and support during this process, and we look forward to sharing an incredible little boy with you when he is ready.